Day 14 – Desiring for Early Death is not the answer to avoid old age poverty.

Day 14: Journey to Life. There is some hidden belief somewhere that I don’t need to do the needful, somehow magically “I will change”, “the good stuff” will come to me. Talking about my retirement savings plan, revealed a pattern where I tend to ‘hope’ things will work out.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that changing the nature of me requires my effort. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe some miracle will save my ass. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that some God or Higher Power will favor me and guide me and protect me and show me the path to salvation 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that some Good Karma from the past will save my ass. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that some grace from God will protect me and save me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that some good fortune will come by and save my ass. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that some good person might save me and show me the way.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that some good guru or saint will protect me and show me the way, meantime i can just relax and take it easy.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to fear taking self responsibility for myself and my future. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not be concerned about my old age and just hope that some good karma will take care of me during my old days. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not plan for retirement days because I subtly believe some good karma will guide me or take care of me. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not plan or save for my retirement days because I subtly believe some good fortune will come by for me so I can just relax now. 

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to think that I will be permanently youthful and no need to be concerned about my retirement savings etc, just hope for the best. in that I am placing my old age in the hands of hope without taking any responsibility for it now. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to speak the words “oh well If I am old and poor someday, I just die away, who cares”, in that not honoring myself as life, and not caring for myself as life. in that, hoping to just die and vanish in my old age, while I can do so much been alive in this world to bring what is best for all. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hope to die and vanish just to avoid old age poverty, while not realizing been alive to bring what is best for all is what my life is all about. So in wanting to die away, I am giving up on myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to wish to die early in my old age, not wanting to live too long, in such nasty desires I am wishing myself death and not honoring myself as life. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to wish to die early so I can avoid old age miseries and poverty.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to wish to die in order to avoid old age poverty at some point. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to secretly believe that my death will eventually bring peace to me, not realizing no such bullshit, ‘no peace here means, no peace up there’.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have faith that my death will bring eternal peace for me. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see death as an escape, instead of living here each breath to bring what is best for all, I have allowed to fancy death to avoid sufferings in my old age. 

When and as I see myself to escaping to hope, to hope of death, to salvation, I STOP such bullshit thinking, I breathe. Instead, I plan to live here fully, whatever the days I have got, I want to live each day, each breath FULLY, so i will do all I can to bring what is best for all.

In an Equal Money System nobody will ever have to worry about old age problems, as all such care will be taken care of, in stead of worrying, you will LIVE. Yes until such system is here, I will direct myself to support myself. And moreover, I will steadfastly commit myself to bring about an Equal Money System that is best for all.

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