I have decided to write daily, now it has been going rather well. Writing is pretty cool way to self express. So why write? I write to share my desteni process of birthing myself as LIFE. I write to expose the abuses in this world that which we blindly accept and allow as normal. I write because of the pain of surviving is so heavy, so to release that frustration.

Also in writing I bring about an awareness about any specific topic, its sharing therefore caring. As more people read and write on issues that matters to us all, an awareness is created about it, as problems and solutions are discussed via writing.

Yet writing is not really about convincing anyone, rather simply placing common sense facts and points about any given issue. There are tons of points one could write about it. In the coming years, as many people go online now, there is a wider audience that is willing to share and learn about this world we live in. As abuses and destructions continue, must write about all those points.

Obviously, writing is also about share the tools of self forgiveness and self honesty with other humans. Giving others a chance to rebirth themselves as life. I can imagine 10 years from now, with all the blogging and vlogging going on for ‘Equal for All’, the degree of awareness about such issues would have widely spread. Its all thanks to taking the time to write daily.

Magically, in that writing process, self-writing to freedom happens, writing is always self writing, as a destonians, my writing also takes me to self freedom.

So Join us: at www.desteni.co.za learn and join the revolution of self writing.

Its a form of self-birthing.

I hereby denounce my former guru or affectionately known as guruji, his holiness Sri Sri Ravi Shankar. Yes “His Holiness” is how spiritual masters are officially addressed. Yes bit of a sad moment, because I do have some nice memories of been part of AOL and been very affectionate towards guruji. But now the time has come to denounce the guru of joy officially.


I have been with many spiritual organizations and for sure I will rank AOL and Sri Sri as one of the best, but unfortunately behind all that niceness lies the darkness of ‘love and light’. Meaning, I along with millions of others went to AOL seeking self-happiness and ended up been a guru lover. Many are madly in love with the guru, myself for sure, I had his pictures all over the house, even in my wallet. I wanted his Blessing all over me. Hence I was in love with the guru of joy from India. I was following and became a CULT follower of Sri Sri.


In terms of his teachings, things were pretty cool. The Sudharshan Kriya or Regulated breathing, was a nice feel good experience, so was all that singing and dancing for holy music was cool too. Millions are drawn to him. I rank him as one of the best because of the breathing techniques that was taught as part of the AOL courses. Eventually of course the guru became a GOD himself, i began to see him as the avatar of Shiva or Krishna depends which one was suggested. Actually even that was pretty cool. And all the social work AOL does year around in various countries is pretty impressive also.


So then, what are my exact reasons to dump my former guru? If you simply look only within the AOL you may never find a reason to dump the master, for that I have to come out of the box. After having met www.desteni.co.za and start using their tools, namely Self-Forgiveness and Self-Honesty, my whole perspective on guru adoration changed completely. I began to become myself, establishing in myself as self- honesty and self-trust. That’s when I realized I have been duped by all the masters before. Though none were of ill intent nor crooks, but in not assisting me to stand as myself they duped me into blind guru worship, which I totally accepted and allowed. So really I cannot blame the masters, it just I went along with the masses.


So my first reason to dump the guru of joy is, I have found myself with self-forgiveness and self-honesty, thanks to desteni.co.za ,which no master before could suggest or teach. Birthing self as life through the physical is a serious self process. Its not about the darkness of love and light. Its not about bliss and joy, rather it is about serious self-digging-out of shit in total self honesty. Try it you will know, and it doesn’t cost you anything.


My second reason to dump my guruji of joy is understanding the purpose of ‘Equal Money System’. In this world, there are 3 billion humans living under 2$ a day, and nearly 22,000 humans die a day due to hunger or related problems. At desteni.co.za they have solution for such massive problems, namely Equal Money System, whereas the Guru of Joy Sri Sri Ravi Shankar got no global solution to end the poverty forever more. AoL is all about love and light, joy and bliss while millions suffer and thousands die a day.


With AOL, I was stuck in love and light, joy and bliss, without ever taking self-responsibility for myself or for my world as myself. With desteni, I am standing as one vote for Equal Money System to end poverty forever more. I am becoming self-responsible, and moreover I am no longer a guru lover, I am self standing as me. Therefore I have all the reasons to dump my former guru Sri Sri Ravi Shankar forevermore.


As a token of friendship, before we depart, I would like to gift the tool of self-forgiveness to Sri Sri and to all of his devotees, let’s see if they are ready to become self honest. May be they will, may be they will give up the love and light and become self honest beings by applying self forgiveness. For that Sri Sri has to embrace self forgiveness and apply to himself and then teach his devotees. Lets hope for the best.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to seek love and light, joy and bliss for myself while millions suffer and thousands die each day.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to live in the delusion of guru adoration.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to surrender myself to a guru in total self abdication.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to give up myself.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to surrender myself to sri sri.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to worship sri sri.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and pretend as if sri sri is GOD.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to adore sri sri as my master and god.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe sri sri to be the master of the universe.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think sri sri to be the god of gods.






I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to avoid investigating cult patterns of AOL, of which i was part of.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to give into cults.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to never take self responsibility for myself and for this world as myself.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear leaving the AOL group.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear leaving the guru of joy.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear questioning the guru of joy.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear sri sri.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to be loved my guruji.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to call sri sri as guruji because i thought it will bring special love to me from him.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be a slave to sri sri.


I stop guru adoration here now as i am the breath of life. I stand equal and one to all, no masters no slaves.
I am here.


Join us at www.desteni.co.za or www.equalmoney.org

YouTube shutdown my recent video titled ‘Islamic Fanaticism Must be Exposed’. The reasons given was violation of community guidelines, how nice.

In my blog I simply pointed out some fanatical comments made by a well known Indian Islamic preacher Dr. Zakir Naik. You can investigate for yourself the depth of madness this man speaks, of course he doesn’t promote violence or anything like that, but fanaticism about Islam been the ONLY TRUTH etc, is very obvious. It is fanatic.

I suppose my video was ‘flagged’ by some humans who didn’t like the points I wrote about the learned professor, so YouTube blindly decided to disable my video which had received about 3000 views within 2 days after been uploaded. The video has touched the raw nerve of some brainwashed humans causing them to fake flag it.

But I am disappointed with YouTube for not allowing the so called freedom of expression, freedom of free speech. I was not hating the professor, rather only pointing out his madness. Is youtube in bed with Islamic Fanatics and/or with their money? I wonder.

Investigate desteni.co.za

Investigate how to make a new world with Equal Money System. See: www.equalmoney.org

Equal Money System is about supporting “my-needs” of everyone; equally means making sure every human’s “my-needs” are met. Equality is not about quota systems. Equality is not about Communism or Socialism, it is simply about taking care of everyone’s “my-needs”, via Equal Money System.

Here please read the word “money” phonetically, meaning hear the sound of the word “money”, then you will hear it as “my needs”. Equal Money is to take care of everyone’s “my needs” as said before, there is nothing communist about it. There is nothing RED about is it, its all green, lol.

Now, for all those who oppose Equal Money Systems for various self-convincing reasons, we could debate each point by point, but lets get to the ultimate point: Your Death.

You’re going to die anyways, so might as well, support a system that will care for every human everywhere. Might as well, support a system that will bring a practical heaven on earth. Might as well, do something that will benefit human race for generations to come. Might as well, stop the abusive capitalistic system of money forever more. You’re going to die anyways, so might as well, cast your vote to bring about a new world that is best for all. And if you don’t like Equal Money, so what, you’re not going to see it anyways, as you’re going to die.

All we are trying to do is support every human being through a democratically elected government system, not welfare, not communism, not socialism, but a system that is good for all. we as humanity will design it, implement it, and maintain it. The details of EMS will be published later via EMS books by the Equal Life Foundation. But do take a moment to consider your last final action, your last voting action, before you die, please make that vote for Equal Money System. At least just before your last breath, cast that vote.

Because your vote from your deathbed will inspire many millions to study EMS way before they reach their deathbeds, realize you’re that much powerful even in your deathbed.

Investigate us: www.equalmoney.org

That is a good question to ask, why on earth are you on earth? I mean you got to investigate the whole the notion of self-mission, why do you even exist on this earth? Do you have a mission, a purpose, an objective?

Generally looking around,  it is safe to assume many have some kind of a mission to be alive and exist on this earth: some want to have a family life, or to be a famous person, or to discover cure for cancer, or to be a political head of state, or to be a priest or nun, or to be writer or to contribute as a scholar, or to invent the next great tech toy, or some exist just to have a good life, to be a decent human being, have a happy time then die away.

Any of the above self-missions is OK, i mean whats wrong in wanting to be a great writer or this or that? Or in wanting to have a nice happy family life? The problem lies in the impact of your self-mission: even if a single human being die out of hunger or hunger related diseases, then all of the above cool self-missions are immediately invalidated. but what?

Regardless of how great you become as a scientist or doctor or lawyer or writer or singer, or businessman, or this or that, if your greatness cannot end the starvation of 1 billion humans each day, and prevent the deaths of 22,000 humans each day, then the greatness of your self-mission is rather useless and selfish. If your existence on earth cannot bring an end to the massive starvation and hunger, then your very existence is rather useless, when your time is up, you will be dead and gone, insignificant to say the least. Because, you never helped to create a practical heaven on earth where no human being starve or die out of hunger, where no human being is homeless, or sick without medicine or unable to see a doctor, where no human being is thirsty without access to fresh water. If you cannot assist to bring a practical heaven on earth, then your very existence is useless along with all your cool self-missions.

On the other hand, along with your personal self-missions, whatever it may be, if you can and able to participate in bringing Equal Money System to end all abuses everywhere, then, your very existence and your self-mission is of praise worthy. I mean after all you cared to end the starvation of 1 billion humans, and help prevent the deaths of 22,000 humans each day. Now that is a serious on the side self-mission anyone can take on, making difference to the whole world. And that’s a pretty serious one too, for sure you will agree with me, if your kids are the ones starving to death each night.

So why on earth, am I on earth? As a self-mission, my purpose is to self-purify me with self-forgiveness and rebirth myself as LIFE, that is my immediate self-mission. Then, to bring about Equal Money System is my next self-mission, both are equally important to me. Even if I reach absolute self-perfection, but humans are still dying out of hunger and starvation, then, my self-perfection is rather useless, however, if i can use my self-perfection to bring an end to all starvation, then, my self-missions are of significant value.

I am going to die anyways, so might as well, create a practical heaven on earth before I die. Ultimately, that is my self-mission, to leave this planet as a practical heaven for all to live in dignity without ever fearing to survive.

Investigate, why on earth, are you on earth? Join us: at www.desteni.co.za

Saudi King Abullah has given ‘permission’ for women in his kingdom to cast their votes in the up coming elections, wow, what a major giant step for women(kind) in that country. While women may call this as a celebration at last for them to speak up, but I see this as a shame brought upon by the Islamic male theology.

For ages they have oppressed women from speaking up and casting their votes because the almighty Allah the God for some male ego reasons believed that half of His creation to be not worthy enough to speak up. Allah somehow has believed that voice of men to be more than ample to make world decisions.

I wonder who this Allah is, is He a Man, or is He a Woman? Certainly Allah cannot be a woman, if that was the case Allah would have allowed her human female creations to cast their votes along with Her male creations. But, that was not the case, therefore we can safely assume the great almighty Allah to be a MAN GOD made in the likeness and image of earthly man himself, always ready to put his male ego before everyone.

So Sham on you ALLAH, you never taught in your holy fucking books to place women in equal position to men and thereby let each cast his/her vote equally at all times. So I say, Allah, you need some serious study in gender equality dude, your male ego is way out of date.

At desteni, we see all LIFE as equal, hence man, woman, children, animals, nature, all are equal in worthiness as all are LIFE. Yes functional expressions are different hence an animal cannot be functionally equal to a human, but hey, at least among humans we all are equals, which cannot be denied, unless you have fucking holy book that teaches otherwise.

Shame on you ALLAH, it look your male devotees till 2011 to recognize a simple fact. What have you been teaching in you holy books, Allah, may i ask?

Investigate us at www.desteni.co.za

Listening to Dr. Zakir Naik has made me realize the degree of fanaticism that exist within Islamic religious scholars and peers. What exactly makes or defines a religious fanatic ? The following simple statement is the most dangerous and fanatic: “We know absolutely that our religion is the ONLY truth and all other religions are false therefore they must not be tolerated or allowed to be preached in Islamic countries”. Now if such thing was stated by the Almighty Allah himself, we could forgive the learned professor, but the sad thing is such delusional conclusions are reached by men alone and propagated by men alone. Meaning religious fanaticism is how man’s ego interprets religious doctrine and makes it so dangerous for humanity. Such ego based religious doctrines at worse could lead to war, and at best could cause irritations between communities of various religions.

It is insane what some of the religious scholars and preachers go on to say these days, therefore I write this as an invitation for all common-sense minded humans to expose (not explore) any religious fanaticism you see on the internet, bring the fuckers out and expose them, make videos and write blogs about them, at least it will give them a chance to rethink their detrimental theology. Certainly to say “I know the whole truth and nothing but the truth therefore everyone is just following their false Gods” is pretty dangerous theology.

Now terrorism and Islamic fanaticism are two different things, here i am not talking about Islamic terrorism, leave that to the authorities to figure that out. Our job is to expose the fanatic fools of the religious kind. Now this is not exclusive to Islam, mind you, any religious fucker with a fanatic touch, expose the bastard so that all may know what he/she stands for.  I am sure any common sensible Muslim may find Dr. Naik to be bit of a fanatic.

I will certainly mark Dr. Zakir Naik as a religious fanatic fool whose lectures are a potential danger to society.

I invite all to consider common sense of human living: need for water, food, shelter, education, housing, healthcare, etc are the daily struggles for every human being, instead of boiling in religious fanaticism, lets focus on the human problems we all face, so investigate Equal Money System and Equal Life Foundation. We have real solutions for real human problems, there is nothing fanatic about wanting to prevent 22,000 deaths per day via Equal Money System.

Thanks. see www.desteni.co.za

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to goto church out of obligation as a child.

As far as I can remember, getting up in the mornings was never a pleasant experience for me, as I often found myself in a bad mood. This morning moodiness perhaps caused by stomach conditions (or whatever) often puts me in war with others. I mean here I am all moody and cranky minutes after waking up, and I am like a vampire looking for blood, on the look for trouble waters, either i will carry on all day with that moodiness or dump it on other via a fight.

Looking back now, i can see this is exactly how I screwed up all my relationships, be it romantic or otherwise. Perhaps physical conditions of my stomach is such that there is a degree of discomfort in the mornings, until I release myself, so perhaps I have a bit of a physical disadvantage compare to most happy go lucky morning birds, but it doesn’t mean I have an open license to declare war against everyone around me just because I woke up with a bad mood. Of course had I taken any liquor the night before then the next day is a whole different story, it will be nuclear war of words and abuse.

Today lying on bed, I can see the so-called nasty moodiness has been activated as usual, my thoughts started to run its story, which is always the case, my moods are always followed by a story in my head which only compounds my emotional state, from been a normal devil I slowly become a blood hungry demon. I need a fight. So as I woke up today like any other day, I was feeling that moodiness, stories are running, all the bullshit I can think of in relation to my current life situation and past etc, I am building up a case against everyone,  as if I am seeking victory against everyone. What total madness, I am allowing my mind state to create hell for me and others just because my thoughts feelings and emotions say so. And I have done that a lot of times.

Now as things are compounding I cannot allow such moodiness to take me over, I mean either I become totally self responsible to contain my morning moodiness or I allow demon possessions takeover. The point is no matter what I feel, what moodiness goes on within me, no matter what stomach/body conditions caused mind moodiness, I am always self-responsible for how I handle my moodiness. I cannot ever say ‘hey my moodiness made me do it’, yes perhaps i could say ‘the devil made me do it’, but cannot blame it on my moods.

The bottom line is, I am 100% self responsible for what I feel and experience within me. I cannot ask for others to fan out my moods, I cannot ask others to speak words of solace to fan out my moods. I mean who is going to put up with my moods, who is going to take crap from me and still willing to fan out my moods? I have been always blaming others and demanding others to fan out my morning blues. Its not working, it never worked in the past, it is not working the present, and certainly won’t work in the future.

I alone am responsible for what i feel and experience within me, no other human being is ever responsible for what goes inside my little head. But i have blamed the world for it. I have blamed everyone for what goes inside my grey matter. Perhaps there is nothing much i can medically do to fix the stomach issues, perhaps there is, I have to investigate some sort of bridge-help to assist to contain my stomach discomfort in the mornings, drink a lot more water perhaps? But no matter what, I am responsible for what goes within my mind. I cannot demand others to cure my body nor my mind. I am here with the power of breath this very moment, and that is my only point of power to find calmness for myself, this breath here now. Until i find that eye of the needle, within my breath here, and take total self-responsibility for myself here, my morning blues will continue to destroy my life.

And i have allowed it, nobody else.

with desteni process, i am learning to take self responsibility for myself, even for things like thoughts, emotions and feelings that runs inside the mind creating self hell.  The good news is its never too late, i am still here alive, i am not dead yet, i am here, i am breathing, so i have a chance to live my life here in peace. To rest in peace after my death is useless, i want to rest in peace here now within this breath while i am still alive. thanks to desteni process, i am making progress. breath by breath, not allowing any falls to be THE fall, but simply standing up, again and again.

Amazing, i am breathing again.  

I was listening/watching an Indian Muslim preacher and scholar Dr. Zakir Naik on youtube, rather mind blogging 10 minutes of bullshit one could ever listen on religious arguments. He went on to say, “we Muslims know our religion to be the only truth, and therefore we don’t encourage the preaching any other religions”. Rather bold for him claim that his religion as the only absolute truth just because that is what Dr. Naik has come to believe within himself.

Dr. Naik has totally and utterly convinced himself that Islam is the only true religion there is, and therefore any other form of religion must not allowed to be preached or practiced in Islamic countries. (I think he corrected himself by saying you can practice your other religions only within your homes, but dare not to preach it to anyone in Islamic countries.)

Likewise if a christian believe and convince himself that “Christianity is the ONLY true religion therefore no other religions should be allowed to be practiced or preached in Christian nations”, I am sure many will call him/her a christian religious fanatic, and rightfully so.

Believe in whatever you want to believe, but to claim you got the absolute truth and nothing but the absolute truth just because you happened to believe it so, is rather mind blogging madness.

Such is the danger of religious fanaticism, it can lead you to do any crazy mad thing destroying self and others.

So I say ban all fucking religions forever more, and please start with Islam.

I don’t believe in any religions, but I apply the tool of self-forgiveness to become a responsible human being so that i can take self-responsibility for myself and for all things in this world. All these Islamic and Christian fanatics, do they ever speak about the 3 billion humans who are living under 2$ a day? Do they every propose a solution to end global poverty and hunger forever more?

Dr. Zakir Naik, what have you got say about Equal Money System? Other than your Islamic religious rhetoric have you got any proposal to solve world hunger and starvation?  

Investigate www.desteni.co.za